One of those days...

Do you ever have one of those days with your kids when you say things that you can't quite believe you are saying, then really quickly look around and see if anyone heard you?

I had that day today.

I have a bad habit of occasionally starting off with a, "If you don't stop that, XX will happen". The problem is that I don't normally have to say anything other than, "Amelia you need to stop doing that, and do this instead". She cheerfully replies, "OH! OK!" or "OK MOMMY!" like it was the greatest idea in the world to stop. But when it takes more than a time or two, I find I don't really have a backup plan. What will I do? I have no idea. And I've found it's not a good idea to wing it. It never works out well. Good thing she's two and has no idea what I'm talking about or she'd laugh her head off at me.

Me: Amelia, Are these your teeth marks in these pool floats? (those big long styrofoam sticks for the pool)

Mia: Uh huh! (with great enthusiasm)

Me: These are for playing with, not eating.

Mia: OK! MOMMY! (nodding and bobbling her head, I think she gets it)

A few minutes later...

Me: Mia, what is this chunk out of this floatie?

Mia: I bite it!

Me: Please don't do that. It's not good for you. Where are the pieces? (And she points to them on the floor). Do you understand Mommy? We don't eat these and we don't bite them either.

Mia: OHHH! OK!

Me: (I want to make sure she really understands) Are you going to bite them anymore?
Mia: YES! I BITE MORE! (and the little turkey is grinning at me)

At this point, I am trying to stay on track and not laugh. I tell her a few more times not to eat it, then exasperated, find myself saying, "YOU'D better not eat it, you will swallow them and mommy will have to... (and here I'm realizing I have no options on what I would do) DIG IT OUT OF YOUR TUMMY WITH A FORK!!!"

Yeah. Brilliant.